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Men's groups

What is the experience of a men's group like?

One of the fundamental beliefs I carry about people, is that we all have basic goodness as a foundation on which we are built.


This isn't some new or unique idea, in fact it's quite old and ancient. It means that as people we are fundamentally whole, complete, strong, vulnerable, compassionate, and in possession of unique personal gifts that we might share with the world during our time here.


I'm not sure that the original idea of basic goodness included this, but I like to add that we all have much to offer the world if we can show up with vulnerability, authenticity, and engage the world with our unique gifts. Diversity is a strength and also why we all end up being so unique as people.

What does this have to do with a men's group?

Sometimes the unique gifts we have aren't so obvious to us. You might find yourself asking the question, "What do I really have to offer the world?"


For starters, this is simply a great question to ask yourself, but as you examine the proposition that you have gifts to offer, you might also find the answer isn't so obvious as to what you're offering. Part of the reason it might difficult to see our gifts is that we all have blind spots; places we can't see ourselves with much clarity. For example,

sometimes it is easy for us to focus our attention on what we see as "wrong" with ourselves, rather than see our deepest gifts. While this can be hard for us to see in ourselves, sometimes the people around us can see our gifts for readily.

Part of the reason people join a men's group is to be seen. In a group setting we are asked to share parts of ourselves with the other people participating, and in doing so we also ask for feedback, "What do you see in me?" This kind of honest reflection is needed for us to have a deeper self-understanding. If it is difficult to see the places in which we excel or the gifts we have to offer, then sometimes the people around us can point us in the right direction. One of the experiences of a men's group is to learn on a deeper level about who we are in the world, and we do this through sharing ourselves with the group.

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